Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Drowning

In work over here.  Somebody throw me a lifesaver.  Preferably the candy kind. :)

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Sanctification Sanitation?

I heard myself explaining the doctrine of Sanctification today at lunch. 

It was an out of body experience. 

Who.  Am.   I? 

What am I doing?

It was weird.

This teaching and discipleship itches my skin and burns in my heart.  Not that comfortable sometimes.  I would rather talk about movies.  Or clothes.  Or the oddities of the human race. 

But here's the nugget gleaned from today for me.  Why sanctification, after all?  Why not snatch us up to heaven in a hot second after we step into relationship?

Because. 

Jesus prayed for us.  That through us as his family the rest of the world would know about Him.  That the rest of the world would see Him in us and know that we are loved, and that He loves them.  The prayer is pretty rad.  John 17. 

Our extended travel time we call life is a message to the rest of our friends and family that God loves them.  I forget that a lot. 

And as we (hopefully) grow in life and Spirit and union with God, becoming more like Him is kind of like tuning an old TV.  The picture comes in clearer for those around us. 

That's just really a purpose that I'm totally fine with, actually. 

And that prayer of Jesus' for me is fantastic.  Gonna marinate in it. 

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Balance

Love becomes sentimental if it is not strengthened by the truth, and truth becomes hard if it is not softened by love.” – John Stott

Find the balance. 

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

No Handle With Care Sign

So, I had a fight with a friend yesterday.  Someone I consider a really good friend. 

And for me it kind of came out of nowhere.  After she explained where she was coming from yesterday I understand how she was upset with me, but in the moment I wasn't expecting it and it hurt a lot. 

Maybe I'm the only one who does this, but I kind of buy into the idea consciously or not, often, that I'm pretty awesome.  I'm a good person.  I love my family and my friends.  I work hard.  I love Jesus.  So you know, how can one not love the glory that is Crystal?  All of this, baby.  Oh. yeah. 

Yesterday was a reality check for me in a good way.  As painful as it was, I needed to be reminded that I'm not as awesome as I think I am really.  And in all of the avenues I mentioned above the only reason that I don't screw up more than I do is that Jesus tells me how to behave. 

I was pretty selfish in my relationship with my friend.  I was wrong.

Dave said something in the last series on sex, yes I did learn something, that has been stuck in my brain for a while.  It was something along the lines that you can't really understand grace until someone has looked at you and known you fully, the good, the bad, the indifferent....and still chooses you.  That's so true.  And it makes me realize again the magnitude of grace God gives me on a regular basis.  Not because I'm selfish.  But because I'm selfish so often and don't realize it.  It such an ingrained part of me.  And He still chooses me. 

And I need to be that way toward the people who hurt me.  Gracious.  Forgiving.  Kind. 

God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.  That's the recipe of how He deals with me on a regular basis.  Disciplining(read giving me reality checks) me appropriately and then being gracious in His forgiveness. 

I'm sorry I hurt my friend, and I hope that she will forgive me.  But I'm glad for the reminder that pride gets you nowhere in life.  Sometimes I think we should all wear signs that say, "I'm human, handle with care."

Monday, June 11, 2012

Tired

Gosh this has been a rough day.  Physically tired.  Emotionally tired. 

Bed, come to mama.

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

I can still see your
eyes as they laugh back at me
crinkle corners and white teeth flash

how many summers did we play
hopscotch and tag with waves
sunrise watching in still quiet peace

how many ways to say i love you
memories to remember
dreams to keep secret
and dares we dared



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