O. EM. GEEEEE.

I am really truly and utterly exhausted.  It's pretty bad when you have to freaking leave the country to rest.  I'm feeling the winds of change start for next year.  No more workaholic me. 

In Defense of Love

Lately I've been noticing a bunch of attacks/criticisms coming from Christian articles on the Twilight series.  To be followed shortly by parallels drawn between porn and the romance novel.  In the spirit of full disclosure, let me say that I am a fan of the Twilight books, I read romance novels, and my husband is one of the critical ones and we are having an ongoing discussion.

So you get an idea of where I'm coming from.

Female personalities have a spectrum, just like everything else.  Some girls are super girlie women who play dolls, love pink and want to grown up and get married and have babies.  The end.  Other girls play with GI Joes, love dirt bikes and want to grow up and run the world.  The end.  (I land somewhere in the middle of that probably.) 

But here's a secret that's true about every. single. girl.  We all want to fall in love.  Be loved.  Be the center of someone's world.  From the playground to the grown world girlfriends talk about many things but boys are a constant to everyone, everywhere.  It's innate to who we are.  Who we are created to be.  God made us specifically for relationship.  Specifically to complete an incomplete man.  The definitions of what romance looks like to us vary from personality to personality.  But the bottom line, is it's always there.

I've always thought it was interesting that God talks a lot about romance and marriage in the Bible.  It's not just a passing thought for him.  It's a central one.  He compares our relationship to himself in a romantic way.  He calls us his bride.  He calls himself our lover.  There's a pretty graphic love story smack in the middle of the bible. (hehe, whatya do with that, romance novel haters?)

One of my many criticisms of modern Christianity, is that the church has run away from sex like it's the devil.  Sex, like many other things, just is.  It's a part of who we are as humans.  What we do with it becomes good or evil.  And the church has let the world have the last word on sex for a long time.  To me this demonizing of a story like Twilight, or an attack on Christian romance novels is just another volley in a long line of harmful and pious rhetoric.  I'm not saying Twilight or novels is for everyone.  I'm just saying it might be ok for some.

It's also interested me that many of the authors of the criticisms have been male.  You wanna know my bottom line?  I think that some boys might be a little threatened by Edward.  Or the hero of a novel.   Give us some credit, gentlemen.  No rational woman really thinks that a vampire would make a fabulous life choice as a husband.  Jack Sparrow is another story. ;)   No rational woman expects her man to be all powerful, wealthy, with the body of Adonis and the spirituality of Paul.

Here's what she does really want, though.  For her man to be her hero.  To be willing to go the extra mile for her.  To lead her with kindness.  To romance her.  To tell her she's beautiful.  The Bible exhorts men to love their wives like Christ loves the church.  Um, there's no romance novel I've ever read that holds men up to a standard higher than that.  Who needs an eternal undead when you have the Creator of the Universe?

So, I guess what I'm saying is.  Lighten up.  Women are going to be in love with love forever.  No amount of Twilight banning or novel burning is going to change it.  Instead of trying to change women, maybe, boys....you could try to romance them.  Just a suggestion.  I saw this quote tonight, and I think there's a good dose of truth to it.

"man, who has scaled Everest, split the atom & conquered the moon, has not yet measured the secret heart of a woman, & never fully will.”

monday night rhyming

like an itch under my skin
you sink in and when
I think to forget you
you begin again

I love this spin
this crazy wind
like a surf girl's best
wave ride in

delirious mysterious sin
is it a contest I can win?
caution is for turtles
forward I go with a grin

How Did I Not Know

This song existed.  And JL sings it.  Luff

Thanks Giving Tres

Today I'm gonna give a lil shout out to music.  Constant companion for working out, working, playing, cleaning, getting it on, going to sleep, driving in the car, worshiping God.  You get the picture. :)

Music one of the biggest pleasures in life for me.  I'm thankful for it.

And here's one of my fave Latin groups with....Colbie Caillat.  Crazy.

Thanks Giving Dos

Today I am thankful for my friends.  I've had a few come and go, but the ones that stay and love me through it all are like little shiny diamonds in my life.  I lean on them for comfort, encouragement, laughter and fun. 

Here are some of the reasons I love the ladies(and a few boys) in my life:

They love shoes
They love bacon
They love vampires
They love a good martini
They love to dance
They love a good sarcastic word
They love art
They love travel
They appreciate the world outside of the USA
They appreciate a good book
And a good meal

  

Most of all my nearest ones love Jesus and can shake some sense into me when I need it.  Pray with me.  Celebrate with me.  Give me good advice based on a Jesus world view.  That's pretty much a treasure beyond measure. ;)

There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.  ~ Proverbs 18:24

Thanks Giving Uno

Today I am thankful for the tensions in my life. 

The tension in painting is taking what I see and visualizing it into something new.  The tension in photography is visualizing it so that people can see something new.  And there is tension as an artist between these two mediums that helps me to think and push my boundaries.  I like it.

The tensions between grace and giving up.  And that grace is winning.

The tension between who I want to be and who I am.

The tension between holding on too tight and holding too loosely. 

The tension between the deadline and the work to be done.

The tension between doing good and growing weary in it. 

The tension between relationship and unconditional love.

These things, these tensions rub my rough edges.  Sharpen me.   Make me stronger.  Hopefully better. 
And in being thankful for them I'm thankful for the tension between my lines and extra pounds because I have more wisdom at 33 than I had at 23. 

Latelies

I spent this afternoon with 3 of my best girl friends getting lunch at La Villa and pedicures after.  Followed by a SJP movie with Jen at the dollar theater.  Winning!

My toes were in a sad state and are feeling much happier wearing their Dulce de Leche color.  You know it's bad when your feet are catching the sheets because they are so rough. :(  That's what a job where you stand for 12 hours will do for you.  Silky smooth now, baby.

Shea and I are back to Nicaragua next Wed.  I have about 394809789873 things to do before we leave, so I intend to spend this week holed up in my office like a hermit.  Also, I need to flip the switch in my brain to Spanish so that I can communicate.  Communication = food.  We all know how I feel about food. haha  Audiobooks in Espanol here we come.

Can't believe this week is Thanksgiving.  In honor of that, Imma post one Giving Thanks post a day till Thanksgiving starting tomorrow. Turkey Day here we come!  Sam is making the turkey this year.  It promises to be an adventure for all of us. 

Baptism was today.  Always love that.

I still love the Backstreet Boys.  May have danced/sung to Never Break Your Heart while making dinner tonight.  True confessions part deux.

The one thing I knew about dinner going into it tonight was that it was going to involve chicken.  And bacon.  Both were successfully incorporated.

But let's be honest.  Bacon goes with just about everything.

Calling 911

Today has been a day of unintentional confrontation.  Here's one of my true confessions.  Ready?  Often, if I see something that shouldn't be happening, there's no filter.  I see it.  I confront it.  This has not always played out well in la vida de mi. 

Which brings us to this morning.  I walked into my, built in the 1800s, office building - filled with wood and paper products and flammable chemicals - to be greeted with the scent of cigarettes.  So I ran downstairs and called out the employee.  Then called his boss.  Visions of escape routes in case of a fire dancing in my head.

On the way home tonight a chevy pickup almost ran into the median wall, and then almost ran off the other side up into the bushes.  And continued to weave erratically all over the expressway.  So I called 911 on them, and ended up behind them at a stoplight, where they got out of their car....my heart rate picked up a lot....got back in.  Tried to back up on a one way street.  Cop showed up.  They tried to outrun him.  It was an old pickup.  They didn't get far. 

Good golly miss molly.  That's enough for me for one day.  I'm ready to go about my merry and peaceably ignorant life tomorrow. 

Something Beautiful This Way Comes

If I'm being honest, sometimes I get bored of the same kinds of love stories.  Same kinds of portrayals.  Same kinds of artists.  I am feeling the urge to move on in my own quest and do something different.  I have some ideas of what that might look like, but nothing is set in stone yet.  I'm going to see Jeremy Cowart in a few weeks, and I'm hoping that will spark some more creative introspection....that changes into direction. 

I read an article recently that said that vintage weddings are trending out.  Maybe.  I don't know that its the weddings that are trending out so much as the way they are photographed. 

I have a couple of projects cooking in my heart for this winter.  Can't wait. 

What is an artist, after all, if the artist doesn't say something? 

Psalm 42:7

Deep calls to deep
   in the roar of your waterfalls;
all your waves and breakers
   have swept over me. 

 photo by rosie hardy

Incredibly Beautiful

i carry your heart with me

(i carry it in my heart)

i am never without it

(anywhere i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done

by only me is your doing, my darling)

                                                      

i fear no fate

(for you are my fate, my sweet)

i want no world

(for beautiful you are my world, my true)

and you are whatever a moon has always meant

and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows

higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart

(i carry it in my heart)

 

e e cummings

Responsibilities

this week has been a plethora of one certain theme.  Usually when something happens more than once in my life, especially in quick succession, I perk up my lil ears, because God is SAYIN' something. 

So here's what's happened. My friend wrote a personal blog about sin and response.

My other young friend, and previous sg girl, wrote an apology.

One of my friends is stumbling in her faith because of a careless comment made by another friend.


Here's what grieves my heart.  Deeply.  This body of Christ that is supposed to be helping each other on toward God.  Spurring.  Correcting gently.  Encouraging.  Edifying.  Building up. 

We are eating each other up. 

Brothers and sisters.  Take off the judging glasses.  Take off the prideful attitudes.  See the inside of the people you are called to love like Jesus.  Guess what, I've done the judging thing.  It doesn't work out so well.  Pride, anger and self righteousness got me pretty much nowhere.  If correction needs to be made, make sure it is righteous.  It is done in love.  It does not come from self righteousness.  It is done gently. 

Romans 2:1-2
You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.

Romans 2: 17-24
if you rely on the law and brag about your relationship to God; if you know his will and approve of what is superior because you are instructed by the law; if you are convinced that you are a guide for the blind, a light for those who are in the dark, an instructor of the foolish, a teacher of infants, because you have in the law the embodiment of knowledge and truth— you, then, who teach others, do you not teach yourself? You who preach against stealing, do you steal? You who say that people should not commit adultery, do you commit adultery? You who abhor idols, do you rob temples? You who brag about the law, do you dishonor God by breaking the law? As it is written: “God’s name is blasphemed among the Gentiles because of you.”


We are responsible for those we lead.  We are responsible to God if we cause them to fall or fall away because of our lives. Because of our pride.  Because of our unmerciful hearts. Because of unwise words.

Let's search ourselves before we point fingers and throw stones.  Or careless words.